6. Ego’s room

Time: At least two periods or till the teacher is satisfied.

Learning objective: To get students to explore how often we forget our needs and get into the endless cycle of fulfilling our ego or show-off.

Start the class with mindfulness – ask the students to focus on their breath for 2-3 minutes.

Direction of Discussion (For Teachers): Respect does not come from show off but it comes from acceptance of a person’s conduct and excellence. We often believe that we will get happiness and respect out of physical facilities and material needs. Unless we know how much we need, we go on amassing physical facilities and still feel insecure. To hide the feeling of insecurity, we move towards more show off.

Story
A man once built a huge house. He made 100 rooms in the house but there were just two people who lived there – his wife and him. Whenever any guests would visit them, the couple would proudly show them the entire house. They would tell about the marble stones used in the house. They would bring the guests’ attention to the expensive material used in the doors and windows. Once a sage came and stayed at their place. They showed the whole house to the sage too. The sage asked the man, “Your wife and you live in one room, who lives in the other 99?” The man said, “No one.” The sage said, “No, from the time I’ve come here, I feel there is a disease that lives in each room.” The couple was a little scared on hearing this. They had a lot of respect for the sage and they thought this great sage may have come to know about some evil spirits living in their house. They got scared.
The sage told them, “A disease more dangerous than evil spirits lives in your 99 rooms, but I will not tell you right now what that disease is. I will return in 2-4 months and then will tell you what it is. But I want you to begin with the treatment right now.” The couple had a great regard for the sage so they said, “If you cannot tell us what the disease is, at least tell us how to treat it. We will begin with the treatment.” The sage said, “From now, whenever guests come to your house, do not show all of your rooms to them. If they come to stay, just take them to the guest room, but do not discuss the marble and the expensive things in that room.”
The sage returned after two months. He asked the couple if they were following the suggested treatment to the disease. They said they were. The sage asked them, “Would you like to know about the illness?” The couple answered, “We have got to know the disease on our own. We lived in one room of the house and in the other 99 there lived the disease of our ego. When we would show off about the rooms and the expensive things infront of our guests, we were actually not showing them the rooms, we were just satisfying our ego.”
The sage was happy that the couple had recognised the disease. After this, the couple happily moved into a smaller house that was sufficient for their requirements.

Proposed questions for discussion
1. Why do some people want to keep things in more quantity?
2. How do you feel when someone shows off in front of you?
3. Have you ever shown off in front of anyone? Why and how?
4. When we score the highest marks in exams and tell everyone that we have scored the highest, is it our need or the fulfilment of our ego?
5. Buying a new pen, even if it’s expensive, it fulfils our need to write properly, is a need or our ego?
6. Is the desire to show off this expensive pen manufactured by a famous company among our friends a need or fulfilment of our ego?
7. Some people go on telling the price of the expensive things they own. Is this their need, or ego or show off?
8. Find five such examples from life around you which, according to you, was something not done because of need, but because of the need to show off and satisfy one’s ego.

At home – Observe, Enquire, Understand (for students):
  • Students discuss the story at home and understand the thoughts and views of their family members.
  • Students observe what things are bought or have been bought in their families without need, just for show off.
Ask the students to sit quietly for 1-2 minutes and reflect on the essence drawn from the day’s discussion.

Day 2

Start the class with mindfulness – ask the students to focus on their breath for 2-3 minutes.
  • Have some students repeat the story.
  • The first day’s discussion questions can be used again for the remaining students.
  • Some other students can share their storytelling experiences at home in groups. Some of them may share with the whole class.
Additional questions for discussion:
1. When someone tries to show themselves as bigger or better than the other, what are the thoughts that come to your mind?
2. Share an incident when you took care of someone or you were helpful to them. How did you feel at that time?
3. When does someone truly respect you? (Example: When you have bigger and better things than them, or when you have been helpful to them?) Share other reasons.

Ask the students to sit quietly for 1-2 minutes and reflect on the essence drawn from the day’s discussion.

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